We live in a society that always wants to be flawless. A society that can never be fully satisfied. We always want to improve ourselves, do more self-optimization, become sportier, happier and more fulfilled. It goes always higher, further, faster. Better. As soon as we reach our goal, it goes straight on. Never enough. More success, more money, more happiness.
Just over half of Berliners are singles. More than half of them are alone in Berlin, searching, despairing or instead enjoying their time alone. After the article “I am alone but not lonely” I thought a lot about being alone and having a life as a single. Mostly, people feel the same way as me. The different reactions of my interviewees were interesting. Many saw the question “Do you like being alone?” as a kind of accusation. “But I’m not,” they replied. I was specifically looking for people who understood me and my world of thoughts. Singles who enjoy being alone. Four people, four emotional worlds. And one thing in common: we all like to be alone. We are all happy.
Far away from worries, everyday life I said goodbye to Berlin. Not to run away, but I needed a time-out. When the plane took off, it was as if the world was taking a deep breath and standing still for a moment. Up there where the city is just a miniature of itself I thought: the perfect place, the moment to write my book. I would sit at the terraces just like I did before, flooded with ideas and inspiration, writing chapter after chapter. I would proudly hold my finished book in my hands and take the flight home. But that wasn’t the case. One day after I arrived my laptop gave up and left me. Without a single explanation. I begged him to stay but he went on strike. Without ifs and buts. That was it with us. After 2 so intimate years. And now? If this situation had happened to me 3 years ago I would probably have panicked. My vacation? Definitely ruined. I sat down and thought. Calmly. My loud voices in the background, I didn’t listened to them. I won’t let myself roll over emotions. In Hanoi I said goodbye to my laptop.
Funny how naive we were. We had dreams, goals, plans. We were so convinced of it. Do a trip around the world with the old VW bus. Only with a tent and a backpack. To be independent, to live freedom – for the day. To hitchhike when money is tight, set up a tent somewhere in nowhere. Both of us for eternity. So sure.
Whether in religion, spirituality or neuroscience: Happiness is happiness. Even if our ideas and feelings differ, we all long for it. But sometimes happiness seems to have fallen a bit by the wayside. Above all in the wild everyday life, between occupation and partnership. How can one finally become happy again and why does it fail? We met with Mr. Dallwitz Wegner a happiness researcher and asked the expert for advice on “eternal happiness”.